Saturday, April 30, 2005
Recruit Wong Weng Keong Of IC number XXXXXXX Requests permission to write blog, SIR!
Ahh ok, some of you may be looking forward to this, some of you might not.
But this is just what i've learnt in army.
Seriously i've understood what everyone's been trying to tell me.
For example,
My coach sjai's been advising me to enjoy army if not every second would progress very slowly.
My boss JH has been telling me he misses the BMT days, and i can see why now.
Everyone has been looking forward to seeing the hair-less keong, and here he is now.
So to update everyone on my army status, and believe me, it's tiring, it's very shagging, it brings loads of hatred, brings everyone's true colors out, brings the bastards out, but it brings the fun as well.
First to say, I enlisted on the 8th Of april 2005 into Pegasus company, section 2 bed 5.
And lucky me, I had a poly classmate, Zuanbao, just next to my bunk in section 3 bed 1.
My OC, Kelvin NG
My CSM aka company sergent major, Staff sergent Whoever (SHIT I DUNNO HIS NAME)
My PC, 2nd Lieutenent Kelvin Tian and the other 2 platoon commanders, 2nd lieutenant Arif and 2nd lieutenant Fadley. (FYI, pegasus has only 3 platoons.)
My platoon sergent, 2nd sergent ben
My section commander, 3rd sergent sutan, and the other 3 sergents of the other 3 sections, 3rd sergent lee, 3rd sergent Fadzri, and 3rd sergent gavin.
Now why did i list all their names?
Because they're fucking niceguys.
My OC talks a little like a gay, but he's really damn nice.
My Company sergent major is a commando regular, and he hasn't really shown his true horns to us, by the way, CSM is like a discipline master in secondary school. He's dirtier than anyone you can ever think of in the entire platoon anyway (in the sense of vulgaraties).
My platoon sergent Ben is a bloody forgetful bugger who just knew me only days ago as the one who made a bet with him as to whether i can throw a grenade into the hole 20metres away or not, and he LOST! 4 canned drinks!! HAHA LOSER!
But seriously, as far as i knew him, apart from his bad memory(Or maybe he's acting blur, because from what i noticed, he seems to forget all the bad things i've done, i doubt it's a coincidence) He's a really nice guy because he tortures us real badly, but does it with us. Basically he's earned our respect. He's very honest with us too.
My section commander, sergent sutan, is the most. . . . . Irritating person in the whole company considering he's the one with the most complaints about us until we know what he loves to say most.
"DRAG DRAG"
"Ah Walk Walk, take your time it's okay"
"Eh your mouth got gold ah"
But right behind, if anyone noticed, he's always verbally screwing us up, but never physically. There's a reason, he doesn't want to punish us (he did punish us real badly yesterday though, not that anyone can blame him since we're the stupid fucks).
Yesterday was the cutest, I lost my 11B, so basically, i can't bookout, nearly cried, but hell, reported to him, he said he'd find me at 10pm while i try to find it. In the end my bunkmate found it under his bed, as to why it was there, you need not know =p.
That bugger didn't come up at 10pm anyway.
Next day he saw me and asked "You know how to book out anot?" And i told him "I found my 11b already" Man he sure was pissed and said "U know how many fucking people i had to fucking call just to get the fucking paperwork to get your fucking ass out of fucking tekong for just these fucking 3 days?"
Man, that was the biggest screwup that happened. Well i did promise him i'd do my best though.
Anyway my plans for now is to try to get into OCS, for a simple reason that I want to sign on into airforce, WSO aka weapons specialist officer, sits in some tower and play computer games (yeah right). If it goes to plan, i'd serve an extra 2 years, 4 years in total including BMT. More importantly, 9-5 scope!! So i can hopefully continue to improve my tennis coaching, and even better if i can sign a study bond with them and go overseas to study first.
OCS (Officer cadet school) is only for the elites though, so i doubt i can make it with my stupid blood disorder inborne disease and high metabolism rate.
So what of army? I'm kinda addicted to it. My bunkmates are nice, fun, irritating, only problem is they all have a girlfriend and i don't. Well just to feel not left out, i'd just bug some girls once in awhile and disturb them (like maggy, who cares if she's in aus)
Back to sergent story, Sergent Gavin is the nicest sergent anyone can find until the only punishment he's given us so far is to go to pumping position for 30 seconds and recover -_-. (when we were late for 20mins -_-)
Sergent fadzri knows me as the, uhhhm, retarded shooter (I failed my Shooting, target's so fucking small, how the hell sia).
I passed the 2nd time though, guess how! (Time crisis style) Who carse about the positioning and the stability, i do it arcade style, See target, move to that position and fire at the instant. So u could guess it. For army people, you guys know the 4 important points. Trigger squeeze has to be stable, butt pressure has to be sufficient, weapon is not slanted, and target does not too much. Good news is, i failed all 4 of these aspects, but hit right on target =p. They can't do shit to me =p. So you'd see all other 19 lanes apart from my lanes having greens all over and people with 16 greens being praised, except me, special, 16 reds =p.
Sergent fadzri also cannot get mad one, u see him scream really wanna laugh, but his punishment of course we obey, and while on pushup position i was kinda giggling. . . He's really not the type to scold people.
Sergent Lee? Dun like him the most, dunno why, he just doesn't look suitable to be a sergent and he looks like the sibei anyhow type.
Other pieces of information would include my stupid seniors, like LESTER HO, who currently is on attachment with OCS attached to MY COMPANY, so he's 1 Barred, meaning he's a 2nd lieutenant and being a platoon commander, so i have to greet him SIR everytime i see his *blech* face. Everytime see him he only can say 4 words to me "Oei Chao Keng Ah"
Other one is the neighbouring sergent, dominic fong -_-. Who would have known he would become a sergent. and he's really irritating and full of complaints, Lucky he's not taking charge of me. I think he must be taking revenge from getting bullied too much back in sercondary school.
Oh yeah my nickname in camp, Toyol, given by my section commander, sergent sutan. Toyol stands for smiling ghost or something in malay. He always tells me to wipe my fucking smile off my face when i'm not even smiling until i told him "Sergent i'm seriously not smiling". So he ended up just calling me toyol. Everyone says i have that cheerful kinda face anyway, think i need surgery.
Time to sleep anyway, tired,
Recruit Wong requesting permission to sleep sir (who cares about you)
*gon3z*
Posted by borny @ 3:41 PM
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Thursday, April 07, 2005
*Tingz* Loserkeong Has Entered Bloggy~
Smell the difference, because today's the first time i'm blogging not cause i'm bored. In fact, i know i'm gonna miss these kinda stuffs.
So i spent the last of my days throwing myself all over friendster and bugging people who has been missing in action or who knows, they got KIA on the battlefield while serving NS (Now we know that's nearly impossible), and it just came to me when i started picking on certain people to read their entire testimonials, plus putting mine into consideration.
For a start, Mag introduced me to friendster, and JH was telling me how popular it was, and when i learnt what it was all about, I told myself that whatever anybody wrote about me, be it the worst descriptions about me, i'd accept it.
As i spent my next few hours reading my own + JH + Mag + etc. etc.'s testimonials, i began realizing something. The only people insulting me, are actually those listed above, aka those closer to me. And even though they're insulting me, you can't smell the least bit hostility in them.
However, putting the buddies aside, the rest would normally be "Good" testimonials, which in turn, says pretty good things about you which is true, but seems to have no bad points. Whereas when you look at my current relationship in reality with them, it's nearly close to a I-Know-You-Hate-Me-For-Whatever-Reason kind of thing. They're on bad talking terms with me sounds the most appropriate to describe. At least, things sure feel ironic that way. What is friendster all about? We write testimonials, for what again? To let people know what a nice guy/girl XXXX/YYYY is? I don't see any point for anyone to be reading my testimonials and think that i'm such a niceguy when they know shit about my bad side. And judging from the way people write testimonials, i'm actually the only guy running around insulting people all over =X. (Mana + Mel, you 2 have got to suck =p, i think i also did something to junjun *cough*).
Smell the irony, try reading the testimonial of anyone close to you, you'd soon go figure what i'm talking about, i bet you people are not dumb not to notice it (Keong has no dumb friends, cause he himself is dumb already, dumb + dumb cannot be together {Keong's Theorem})
So the next idiot who reads my friendster testimonial, plz point finger and say "BullShit" =D.
Today i have this shaver story, which in fact, got me into alot of trouble. $16.90 and i got scolded for so much.
Well army letter did write "You are advised to bring shaver", and i asked JH if can dun bring, he said no, and say commander buey song ask u cut off your side burn or whatever, that's why you need it. So I listened to him, because i know nothing anyway. Not that I don't believe him nor trust him, i'd rather place my faith in him since he's the most recent armyboy around, but things sure turned messy bigtime.
My coach actually shouted at me over it, like "Why the hell you need it for? You don't have no moustache or whatever." I couldn't answer.
Father and mother said the same shit, I couldn't answer.
Like what the hell i just felt like saying "Better safe than sorry =X" to my coach and shouting to my parents "Aiya Give you as birthday present lor!"
I mean, I already bought it, what u wan me do? Refund? I wouldn't anyway, i'd still trust my fren even if you called me dumb 50000 times, No one is always right, everyone makes mistakes, and it's a fucking $16.90, don't make it sound like i got ripped off or whatever. I got it from NTUC, not from some roadside sales man sheesh.
I always feel stupid getting scolded around, but precisely cause i know nothing that's why i'm relying on friends, don't have to mess me around left and right even if i am dumb, no?
Try to understand from the dumb person's point of view, at least i'm not gullible and easily deceived, these kind of things can compromise why not sia. Not say i buy a damn fucking dynamite home that u need to panic until liddat zzzzzzzzzzzz.
So i'm left with 32 hours before i'm going over to Tekong, better smell my pillow one last time (CZ's words of wisdom), and enjoy the bed.
Oyasuminasai~
*Keongtardz is offline~*
Posted by borny @ 3:49 AM
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Wednesday, April 06, 2005
Took me alotta boredom and time to just read up on all the testimonials i had in my friendster.
Last i remembered logging in was yesterday, and last last? 6 months back.
I needed that stupid kelvin to tell me that he was waiting for me to add him yesterday, and once i did, i got back to friendster fever.
It was easy to tell why anyway, I seriously felt my time was running out, My free time, that is.
Looking through friendster seriously shows how much of my life was actually spent with them.
Primary skewl mates, i doubt i've forgotten them. Zheng Xinhe And Zhou Junwei, wherever the hell you two are, i know you two are damn intelligent bastards right now and for all i know, your army days are ending. Damn hell contact me already. . . Idiots.
Sec skewl? Ahbao~ Wilson~ Awyong~ Jorim~ Andrew, who can forget the idiots who fought to protect me when i always tio bully by the ahbengs =p. Wilson chew is forever a loser in my EYES!!! Hi wilson =p.
Not forgetting club gang, Gary Tan, missing in action bastard, another one i'm searching for, shorty who i bet has grown tall now, Aaron/Adrian lim, Lester ho, Leon/Mervyn Lee, Shaun/Wayne Yap, Melvin tan, Phelan/Preston Phua. Look i don't remember the whole gang, least i remember most of you.
Here's something for Mr Leon lee, It's kinda true now that i look at it that we disliked you during that time and you always get bullied and you ended up crying. Whatever it is, shit happens, what's done is done, i'd still present you with my sincere apologies if you wanted it, but do remember that i always watch out to everyone of you, and i hope none of you actually end up being society wastrels.
To awyong, get your sorry ass to me right now! I want your damn bloody contact, why is it so hard to contact you!? Much harder than contacting Melvin sia, you got a girlfriend who ties you up at home 24hrs a day is it!?
I still can remember our sec skewl days where i felt my first love, heh. And you had to be the bloody bastard to keep trying to threathen me with it. I seriously missed those days, you can actually go browse through friendster and find her, like what i did yesterday, anyhow click around and i saw her by sheer luck. Makes me wonder what's wrong with me, why did i even end up on bad terms with her sia -_-. Go take a look at what a beauty she's become o_O. Ok end of girls topic, i'm getting emotional.
Let's move on
Upper sec? Ian Toh And Shaun Teo. Yeah i know we went through much on our days, but i knew there had to be a day i'd force my way out of your methods. Simply enough the way you do things is too much to the extreme, and you really might end up killing someone someday. I know what good friends you guys can be, but seriously, you guys don't know when to stop. Everyone has their own opinions, so if you enjoy it, live with it, just leave me out of it.
SG gang! can't remember all their names, pray those bastards remember me for my ridiculous whining and screaming at them all day, all hits, 987FM~. Calvin seems to be doing well, Ahbao, u better not become ahbeng or i cfm personally go down jurong east and pay a visit to your home. Jason aka buddy, i still have contact with him, nothing much with him right now.
Poly~ No one would forget the naggy bitch alicia and my ah mei chew~ + andrew and desmond makes the gang of 4 (I didn't count wrong, I'm just an extra you see).
Koonseng~alan~weiquan~blablabla, these guys were the ones who gave me the biggest experience of my life, to knowing their good points and then knowing their bad points later, but like i said, who has no bad points sia. They also taught me what rivalry is all about, but i'm just too lazy to care~, i must admit i got hit pretty hard though. Really felt like crying during that time. HaHa~ Keong? Cry? I cry all the time =) I just don't show it to you, like how you guys keep your stuck up attitudes to yourselves.
Then came the legendary big boss Leong JH, somehow he totally opposed my behavior, while i didn't like his either but didn't oppose. We're like exact opposites with similarities as well. That's where we learn the most. We get honest with each other, we try to change for the better, we smile at the future, and we fuck each other upside down~. Although i still must say the one getting fucked is still me.
Whole entire class, sorted by index number uhm, who? Forgot. Bryne is 3 rite? dunno liao lar, entire class were pieces of shits in my eyes cause they all looked nerdy. They ended up becoming my support pillar and indispensible people of my lives. Moral of the story? Never judge a book by it's cover. You can think them that way, but don't ever assume them to be that way.
And the tennis team, I seriously didn't want to be in there after i was in there because of a certain somebody that i won't point fingers at. I got to understand the first time about the power of love and what it can drive a person to do. Almost everyone got hit, for some reason i wasn't included, maybe cause i'm not handsome =p. But when all these shit happens, I'd prefer sitting at a corner not getting involved. That's how messy the tennis team was.
What the 3 bitches would normally say "Got miss me anot?" They succeeded pretty well because I'm seriously missing their nagging and crappiness now that two of them are not in singapore while the 3rd one just dissapears working in some part of singapore. Morever my army days are closing in, so no suprise for me to start thinking of em.
Dajie, thanks alot ah, you had to open the hugest door of my life and produce a major change in my views of things. I may regret listening to you, but at least i know for sure, it's a good thing. I can't possibly look at all girls as bitches forever. You'd still be a bitch in my eyes tho =D
2 days left before my enlistment, and here i am, proudly presenting to you my next topic:
Disagreements.
Disagreements are basically starters of every argument and whatever nonsense, depending on the level of tolerance on both sides and sorts.
Put for example, JH is always unhappy that i am very indecisive and hesitant. I don't find anything wrong with him apart from that part of him that always makes him a very hotheaded person that blows up almost at any instant something goes wrong.
Put the KTV incident for example, he was damn pissed over the fact that the aircon was under maintenance and that they didn't say no shit, while outside aircon's still doing fine. As a result, he kept the door wide open, hoping that the noise would stir up some trouble. On the other hand, me and the rest seriously didn't want to make a big fuss about it, furthermore we felt pretty awkward singing when the door's wide open and letting our awful voices get out. Simply enough, he blew up after my explanation and just ended with a "Fine, whatever" and slammed the door~. It's understandable that he was standing up for us as well, but I didn't like to handle matters hotheadedly. Good thing was, we argue almost every so often until we'd just talk about it and just share our views, and end it peacefully.
Put another example, I've always had a friend who i always play game with, yeah well, Novenics to be exact. In all my years of playing games with him, we fell out on quite alot on occasions because we both always end up disagreeing with each other, and none refuses to budge, while time will just cool it off and somehow we'd just end up playing with each other again. Problems? I find his tone extremely insulting and sarcastic, while he says that i complain too much. He's still using that complaining as an excuse against me all the time, so i can't really do shit since i really do complain alot, but i'm not really into admitting defeat because the guilty party wasn't me at all. He always had to throw in that stupid tone which greatly pissed me off. And go figures, i guess it was time to end it once and for all. Easily enough, it's to fall out and not get involved with him any longer. That should really help the both of us, though i'd just lose a group of friends to play game with.
Simply enough put, disagreements can end in two ways, peace or hostility. It just depends on both sides. Seriously if both sides can compromise, resolving matters is actually much easier than you'd think it to be.
If you ask me about the 2nd situation, I'd just say this. I broke the hurdle of the "shamelessness" of apologizing for being in the wrong. He hell doesn't apologize for anything. What do you want me to say? To just apologize for every argument like i'm at fault all the time? That'd seriously make no point, if you ask me.
There's another group who i actually argue alot with, that's my family. Hanging around with them too long has simply made me too irritated with them already. I just didn't like the way they do things. Sometimes I really want to tell them things but they just make a huge fuss over it when i'm just expecting a small answer. All 3 of them are a bunch of naggy people who don't stop once they start. I bet i have those genes as well, but at least i don't do it to them. That's why i'm the youngest? I have to tolerate their crap?
I have my own life, i don't at all want a brother who just breaks into my room all day and seeing new things and touch touch touch all over and proclaim "I CAN GET CHEAPER" and all that kinda thing, I'm NOT INTERESTED.
As for my mum and dad, it'd be real good if they don't make a big fuss over everything. Small thing can say say say until it becomes real big. And they claim i'm the one making it big. It would never have started if they never set it up first. Sheesh.
Disagreements? They're all over. I would really want to compromise with my family, but i keep telling them, and they just do it all over, aka they don't change, so i suppose i'm supposed to compromise with their attitudes? Give me 2 years and i'll let army do the changing.
Among friends would seriously be the easiest, each side just gives and takes, this world will be a much better place.
Army Army Army~ Recruit Wong Weng Keong reporting in SIR!
Enjoy it, appreciate it, don't loathe it. It's free training ya know.
Posted by borny @ 3:57 AM
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Monday, April 04, 2005
I'm counting down 4 more days, in fact, 20minutes to 3 more days.
This is the most weird feeling i ever felt, spending 2 years of suffering.
I'm looking forward to entering, and then again, looking forward to getting out.
I don't wanna go army, but i know i need it badly.
What do i want?
I want the army's discipline, training, Avoidance from FAMILY, training of lone survival, and more importantly, to get me to finally kick the desperation habit.
I just can't wait to get NS over and done with already, actually. I've got loads of stuff waiting for me to do out there. For some reason i'm really having the major urge to further my coaching studies and become an outstanding coach.
It sure was hard saying bye to those kids, sure was great to have loads of fun with them, the money? I don't care about that anymore, it's the fun i get with them, not including the irritation they give me. Just can't wait to get out of camp and laugh at them again.
Then again, once i'm done with army, i think i'm really gonna fly overseas. Singapore sports council doesn't seem reliable to me in anyway about their studies, so i guess the safer bet is to fly over to aus, so i have lots of shit research to do as to which U to try for.
And obviously, to survive in australia, i gotta have my level of discipline, the ability to be independant, do everything on my own, rely on myself alone, and more importantly, be alone without singing "Dang ni gu dan ni hui xiang qi shui" everyday.
Anyway, this is to the people i'm going to have to thank for all they've done for me heavily throughout my holidays:
First things first, it's gotta be my coach. Sjaiful Sjharin (I think that's how it's spelt). Yes i'm a racist, yes he's a malay, but this guy's pretty fair in my opinion. He criticizes almost everyone, his kind, our kind, whatever kind. You can't blame him anyway, he's just a pretty high-end type of person. I'm low end type (aka chin chai, or to make it sound worse, Bochupz). It's good listening to his crap, but most of the time, whatever he talks about, i totally don't know shit, and that shows the major inconvenience when you don't stay updated with this world. Basically on my own opinion, I don't get along well with him, but for all the reasons, i can only look at it that i'm on the losing end. Anyway, this guy really tries to help out if he can, that's if he doesn't really hate that person. He gave me the oppurtunity to do one of his coaching programs and it turned out to be a real good experience for me, it was obvious enough that he can do without me, but he still took me in for the experience, so i gotta be hell thankful for that. I also know that there's a possibility he doesn't want me to rely on him forever, so i have to find a way to muster the courage to start coaching on my very own. I'm not sure about that, but up till now, he has seriously been a major part of my life. Adidas attire discounts =p, lobangz etc. He's done it all. If i had a choice though, I'd try to associate less with him cause I bore him easily -_-.
Next would of course be Boss Leong. It's true he's been scolding me alot and been unhappy with me a certain times, and i really can't help it cause it's truly Keong you're looking at, and seriously, sometimes we just don't agree with what each of us do, but at least i'm glad we're totally honest with each other. My coach doesn't even tell me what's wrong with me so i can only look at his bored face and just keep quiet. Hope you'll be more tolerant with me, and ureally gotta train your bad temper, i know i have a pretty bad temper, yours is WORSE! Even chris also got problem handling you. Thanks for all the help for all the preparation for my army stuffs, even you worry more for me than i worry for myself, what can i say? You're still the best.
Ah chris, with "stupid Keongs" all over. My retribution for hating you at first i guess wahahaha. Aiya you also full of trouble lah, and i know handling this boifren of yours is really tough, but seriously u duneed to handle him one la, he'll handle everything for everyone =D.
Ben, study study study~ I wouldn't be entering army now if not for you, seriously. You'd probably be one of the best examples i'll look up to. Nat n chewy tooo~
Maggy, always there to listen to my troubles and stories, and i seriously don't share them much, but i know your opinions are honest too. To be honest i really don't stand up to getting scolded much, i'd just feel awkward and stupid, but the only 2 who always makes my head go down with some scolding, is you and JH already.
Dajie, really suprised u called me on my bdae lah. I don't think we'll see each other often for the rest of our lives though, so while I still can, i'd prefer meeting you whenever i can when you're back in singapore, then it'll be my turn to be in aussie.
Kel, Weihan, Glenn, had to thank you 3 the most for giving me some experience with handling coaching people of your kinda level, though my confidence is not that high up, i guess i'm pretty much ready to face the real world.
Bitch, you're the 2nd only one where i mostly tell my crap to, because your opinions are yet again, harsh but honest. what else can i say lah hor, faster get a boifren lar.
Think i won't say anymore, somewhat i feel like i'm just writing a dying message wahahaha.
Seriously, i really felt happy when those kids were pretty excited over me coaching them, they enjoy me around, i enjoy them. Those stupid clowns refusing to go to other people's queue but mine, they're all fun kids to be with. Kids? Adorable little bastards/bitches wahahahah.
So, i'm expecting alot outta army, and they're expecting much outta me too, let's hope we help each other out bigtime eh?
Posted by borny @ 11:38 PM
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Friday, April 01, 2005
You know, they always say, time changes everything. It has really proven to be a fact, considering that we've witnessed so many changes to everything around us as time passes by.
But my real question is, can time really change everything? Are there some things which time will never change? I also wonder why?
I had a talk with Liping a week back. Of course it was a pretty serious one. This week her situation seems to have worsened over her studies (check her blog) , but one thing for sure, that proves she's normal. She's not the only one suffering, that is, but I'm drifting out of point.
There are things, which i desperately want changed, but somewhat, it just refuses to change. Obviously enough, it's my dumb mindset and all the rubbish you can think of in it.
If i had a fucking wish, first thing i'd wish for is to stop being a bloody mind-drifter who begins thinking 50000 case issues over a small issue. Just makes me feel like the type who makes small matters turn into huge ones, but i don't actually do it, a long time back, that is.
There's a reason why i've had many friends, but few good ones, that's cause i have a bad temper, a bad personality, and a stupid mindset. And all three of these, i can't change. Wanna teach me how? I'd gladly learn.
There's seriously one thing people need to learn though. They always think they know the solution to everything, but don't apply it themselves. That's simply called not practicing what you preach. So, everyone's gotta watch out for that, that's the main reason why i don't listen to some retards try to talk some sense into me.
So what remains unchanged in me? I'll tell you right now.
Firstly is, of course, what i talked to Liping about. Like duh, same shit i get everyday, from my family, friends, getting a girlfriend.
So what's stopping me? Guess, it's not hard.
There's a reason why i always try to drop that topic, because you wouldn't want to hear it. I've had few people honestly talking to me about it, and a ton of Mr. Act Toughs showing up after hearing it.
First things first, if you tell me that i know alot of girls, No i don't. I just know an average number.
Second, the girls that normally come to my house, which one do you actually see me close with? All fren fren that kinda pattern u wanna tell me every single girl i bring home = girlfriend? Liddat dunno how mani of my guy-frens wanna wack me up liao, considering they're all their girlfriends.
So when the girlfriend topic shows up, what do you seriously want to hear from me? That i already have a target? Lazy to find? Already have one but dowan say?
This is the real answer, and you ain't gonna like it(And i do remember saying it before):
I'm basically desperate i'd just go for anyone.
If my mum hears this, i bet she'll lock me up at home, even if she doesn't, i'd probably end up locking my heart elsewhere so that i'll never fall in love until i get this stupid desperation out of my head. And simply speaking, there's no way it can ever get out?
Sure, solutions, go to geylang? Expensive, and i'd rather beat those wretches up.
rape someone? I'd chop off my arms before i think of doing that
And one of my actual principles was to actually find one that i'd have no regrets going for and stay devoted to her forever, which actually means as simple as having only her in your mind.
But i fucking don't?
And you think i want it? No i don't? I'd be happily crashing into the amazon basin and spending the rest of my life there than live in society with that kind of stupid mindset when i don't even dare to face any girl~?
Guess my worst nightmare right now. That's when some girl just comes up to me and tells me that she likes me, and i'd immediately just grab it.
When that happens, seriously i hope Mr Leong JH can specially just run out of camp along with his rifle and pop a damn bullet on my forehead. I would seriously smile at him and say "Thank you"
Nuff bad things said. Think that probably solves most mysteries about why i'm always so shady about relationships. So by doing this i hope whichever busybody who wants to know about my plans in a future relationship can just keep quiet about it.
So if we talk about something happy, let's just say I haven't really lost touch with my circle of friends. I was really suprised when they threw that suprise birthday party for me 7 days in advance. I got totally ambushed. Good job =p. You guys would kill me if you all knew what i actually wished for, I'm not telling you all anyway.
More importantly, that day is the last day anyone's gonna have a record of my long hair =), and of course, it was fun, though i puked really badly and got insulted for being real stupid, but i always am anyway, no harm being yourself, no?
7 days left to my army days, though i don't really wish to go in, i'm having high expectations of myself in army. Seriously hope army will change me in terms of discipline, decision-making, decisiveness, cool-headedness, and staying away from girls (yeah right).
But i'm really glad i'm entering army, less trouble from family, i don't even want to bring my handphone in. All the hassle of handling it, risk of getting stolen, no GF anyway, contact who, mother? She'd say the same thing all day, might as well wait till bookout then let her talk. I need a handphone that can watch anime wahahahaha.
Ok nuff crapz, i seriously think i am a blessed person surrounded by buddies, so what can i say? U all only want me blanja right -_-.
Yet another long post by :
k_k hospital~
Once A Loser, Always A Loser, This World has To Have Losers Anyway, So What's Wrong With It?
Posted by borny @ 12:11 AM
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